Posts tagged terrible writing
Fifty Shades of Why
New York Times #1 bestseller. Adapted from Twilight fanfiction.
This can't possibly end well.
Ever notice how the quality goes down the toilet as a sex scene in a badly written fanfiction approaches its climax? It’s almost as though the author got distracted by their own arousal and forgot about things like grammar or avoiding repetition. At least everything is spelled right so far.
The combination of deeply ingrained neuroses and a poor visual imagination make E.L. a debilitatingly bad writer.
Anonymous asked:
"...burning cheeks, pounding hearts, lowered gazes, bitten lips..." That is from a June 17 post that an Anon wrote in, and it is so far hotter than anything in the actual book. The irony is that Anon was trying to criticize all the awful descriptions of Ana's "steamy" feelings, but he couldn't even properly mimic Elsie's style. The moral of the story: It takes serious effort to write that badly.
Anonymous asked:
Every once in a while I look at this blog and think THIS BOOK IS TERRIBLE AND HE HASN'T EVEN GOTTEN TO THE SEX PART YET.
Every time I open the book, I think the same thing.
Followers, if you ever write one character doing things to another character against their consent solely so the love interest in the story can swoop in to save them, I will personally come to your house and take your writing implements away.
Going boldly where no man has before.
Instant boner-kill. Unless you’re Brad Altman, I suppose.
There is so much wrong with this paragraph that I can’t fit all of my problems with it into one post. I think I’ll go cry into some ice cream now.
I cannot stress how important it is to consider the meaning of the words you use. Just think how much less creepy that sentence would have been if it’d ended with “checking if I’m okay” instead of “gently probing, examining me”.
Have you ever read a romance novel where everyone isn’t constantly gazing at each other while being either unnerving or spellbound?
I didn’t think so.
japanaisy asked:
Maybe the editor was so horrified that he lied about having edited it at all and instead spent his/her time playing golf or something.
I like this theory.
Fangirls, you know how you feel about that really cute picture of your OTP? Well, that’s how Ana feels when she thinks that Christian Grey likes her.
